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19 November
Everybody knows one
Long, long time ago Mawk was in a band. Long time ago Mawk left the band. Not so long ago the band dis-banded. The band reunites for a one time only show at NorthGate Tavern. Mawk invites the clique members plus.
O'Dell attempts to force me to get my free spiritual reading from the freaks camped outside the bar. The freaks gave me evil looks because I wouldn't sit down and have my aura read. Lucky for me the freaks in the bar aren't as pushy and judgmental.
The burner was already inside the bar drunk and looking to burn someone with her uncontrollable cigarette. The game of the night was to move out of her kill zone, frequently placing the Captain closest to her.
The band, Tabu, didn't crank up until after midnight after their 10 minute prayer. Yes, I said prayer. Who says hard core trip-hop rockers can't pray before, during, during, during and after their gig?
Because I am a big nerd, I brought my camera to the performance. In case you've forgotten about my photography skills, I still suck at taking pictures, but look at em anyway. The photo captions are witty as usual.
ramblings by Whitey on 11:21 PM110179373588015120 Whatcha talkin' bout?
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15 November
Privilege or punishment
It started two weeks ago Saturday. I made an appearance at a Saturday morning class in order to make up class hours missed from sinuses, work and voting for W. Yes, Guam your fears are confirmed.
Overall it was a small class for a Saturday morning, but I was the highest ranking adult in class, which has it's disadvantages. Most of the time I don't even give it a second thought, I'm a red belt and with that rank comes responsibility. However I got asked to teach the following Sat class (this past Sat) because every single black belt and several higher ranking red belts were testing and couldn't teach. Asked to teach really means I was informed by my instructor I was teaching.
It's hard as hell for me to get up before 9am on a Sat morning and attend class. It's even harder to get up before 8am to open the school and teach. Anyway I made my peace with it and prepared a week in advance what would be covered. I'm a great teacher. Yeah! - that was sarcasm.
Total number of students in the class = 6. One of which was 5 year old Tyler, who was participating in his second class. of karate. ever. I assigned the only other adult attending to assist Tyler; which left me with 4 children to instruct for 2 hours. Sigh. Four kids all under the age of 10.
During warm-up, a 7 year old yellow belt asked if he could remove his do-bak (uniform) because he was hot. After spending 2 hours with this kid, I firmly believe this child is the devil in a do-bak.
I felt it was an uneventful, uninspiring class that no one enjoyed. The kids, dropped off by their parents, didn't want to be there, didn't want to learn and I didn't want to waste my sleep time for 4 students.
Being a senior student sucks.
ramblings by Whitey on 9:49 PM110179203996831996 Whatcha talkin' bout?
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14 November
Bootie Dancing
Bring on the bootie because we're going dancing. The group, here by referred to as the clique, because let's face it, that's what we are, a high school clique, went to shake our collective groove thang. And for those reading not officially in the clique, asking to come out with us automatically means you're excluded. After all, not just anybody can be a part of the clique. Isn't that the point?
The destination of choice was South Downs Lounge. It's certainly not trendy or hip, but they serve beer and are the home to The Purple Haze - the drink not the song. Plus the bar isn't teeming with 18 year olds drinking for the first time. Back in the day, I felt out of place at South Downs because there seemed to be a significant age difference...I was way younger than the regulars. Now it seems I am the appropriate age of the regulars. Which I think kinda sucks, but now I don't really care...as long as the 18 year old hoochies aren't slutting it up.
A booth was acquired as base camp. Various clique members ventured to the dance floor while others drank. And by others drank, I mean me and Mawk. See me, I like to booze it up before I bootie it up; however others, like A & K can shake it at any time. Also, A & K got free booze from strange men because they can and do shake it. Neither I nor Mawk got free booze from strange men.
I spotted several celebrities at the local bar. Notice the use of the word "I." Cedric the Entertainer was there, watching all the women work it, while former surgeon general C. Everett Koop drank at the bar. The joy of spotting C. Everett Koop was lost when I had to repeatedly explain who he was and why he was/is famous.
A & K got felt up by Sir Humps Alot, but not at the same time - although they probably would have gotten free booze out of that one too.
After the booties were shook, we ate bacon at IHOP. The drunks love IHOP as indicated by the two police officers needed to control the demand for pancakes at 3am. And I am qualified to make this assessment because I was not drunk, nor was anyone in our clique, except A & K - but they did eat all of their bacon.
ramblings by Whitey on 10:01 PM110178985831872553 Whatcha talkin' bout?
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25 November
What's wrong with your hair?
Turkey with the folks always brings out the crazies. The crazies being my family. Mom outdid herself this year; she invited a stranger to eat with us. Someone she met a work who helped her with a computer problem and had no one to spend the holiday with. She knew him for two weeks before she invited him.
Except Mom never asked if he had plans, she just assumed since he was single and both parents were dead, he had no plans. He was an hour later for dinner because he was at his second dinner of the day. AND after our house would make another stop at his forth dinner of the day. He got invited to four dinners and accepted every invitation.
I was the official chauffeur of Aunt Helen, who had her license revoked for repeatedly driving in the ditch or off the road. When I picked her up, she stared at my hair and said, "what's wrong with you hair?"
Me: What do you mean?
Her: What happened to it?
Me: What specifically are you talking about?
Her: Why does it look that way?
Me: What way?
Her: Like that.
Me: What? the color? the cut? what are you talking about?
Her: Why does it stand up like that?
Me: Why indeed.
Explaining it was the "style" and it was "sassy" was lost on her.
The bossy sister brought used bread for dinner. Used. Bread.
BS: Hmph, the bread doesn't taste right.
Me: What?
BS: It's supposed to be crunchy on the outside and soft in the center. But it's notI guess it got reheated too many times.
Reheated too many times? WTF? How much does bread cost? A dollar? Why is it necessary to reuse bread from a previous dinner? I don't understand.
Later I went to O'Dell's place, where her father, Mr. Walter, made eyes at me and questioned Larry about our relationship. Larry is what Mr. Walter called Mawk. It seems because we were both over there at the same time we were seeing each other. When O'Dell explained otherwise, Mr. Walter was excited I was still available. He just had both hips replaced and is looking for a good woman.
I could become O'Dell's younger, prettier Step Mammie.
ramblings by Whitey on 7:35 PM110256464720955348 Whatcha talkin' bout?
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23 November
Boob bruises
My boob hurts. That's right. My boob hurts after getting punched tonight by a 3rd degree black belt. It wasn't a delicate little tap, but a full-force punch. However, my shins and feet ended the night worse than my boob. My right foot is swollen and bruised.
Karate sound like fun doesn't it?
ramblings by Whitey on 9:29 PM110256327011844992 Whatcha talkin' bout?
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22 November
Circus comes to town
The Royal Haneford Circus to be exact. The circus was in town for only 2 days with 4 performances. After a failed attempt to get the clique to attend, I went with K and her husband and kid. Talk about a third wheel.
Instead of a tent, the circus set-up inside at the Centroplex, which is just a brilliant idea - controlled temperature. The tigers performed first, followed by the acrobats. Then three separate acts started in three separate rings, which I find completely unfair. How can I be expected to follow any act for any length of time. Trying to pick and choose which one to watch proved to be a hard decision.
During intermission, who has intermission anymore?, the kids got pony and elephant rides. I stole stale cotton candy from the kid. Then I almost choked on a hunk of undisolved tuft of cotton candy. Sucking on fluffy chunks of sugar transform into jagged sugar crystals if you don't swallow fast enough. Lesson learned - small bites of cotton candy.
The dancing horses, white poodles, dancing elephants, a mexican dancing family, daredevils, and Burmese contortionist twins closed out the show. Lot of dancing going on at the circus.
Highlight of the show for the kids: the elephants pooped.
Highlight of the show for the women: Leo Garcia -daredevil.
Highlight of the show for the men: Burmese twins.
The circus offers something for everyone.
ramblings by Whitey on 8:55 PM110256209384312368 Whatcha talkin' bout?
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