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28 May
Doctor, Doctor
After 3 days of swelling & limping, and an impending trip to DC, I went to
the doctor. I'm concerned about traveling on a bum knee.
I tried to get an appointment with 3 different doctors, who were all on vacation.
Finally a nurse worked me into somebody's schedule.
Long story, not so long, the doc thinks I tore a ligament in my knee. He doesn't
think it's the ACL - that's the good news. Bad news is it could be one or
more of the smaller ones.
I've got an MRI scheduled for Wednesday. And as an added bonus, my trip to
DC is nixed. Doc says my knee is too unstable for walking in the airport and
taking the stairs. Yea! a silver lining.
26 May
Gimp girl returns
I woke up this morning unable to bend my knee. It's swollen and stiff. Hee!
I said swollen & stiff.
I'm walking around like Frankenstein. I've perfected the limp and the limp/drag.
Turns out that using your knee to walk is important. I predict more ice and
advil in my future.
I think I'll skip karate tomorrow night, giving my knee and the bruises time
to heal.
26 May
Gimp girl returns
I woke up this morning unable to bend my knee. It's swollen and stiff. Hee!
I said swollen & stiff.
I'm walking around like Frankenstein. I've perfected the limp and the limp/drag.
Turns out that using your knee to walk is important. I predict more ice and
advil in my future.
I think I'll skip karate tomorrow night, giving my knee and the bruises time
to heal.
25 May
Knee me
The little voice inside my head told me to skip red & black belt class this
evening, but I ignored it.
After participating in regular class, I opted to stay for the advanced class.
I'm starting to worry over my techniques and materials needed for the next
test at the end of July, so dedicated time for my material wouldn't hurt.
After blocking front & back kicks from a teenager black belt male (IE more
bruises on top of current bruises); I'm partner with karate robot. Karate
robot is a 4th degree black belt with no mercy.
We spent fifteen minutes alternating kicking techniques and blocking the kicks.
On the very last spin back kick, I lost my balance and fell on my left knee.
When I hit the ground I heard a loud pop, but there was no pain. When I got
up, I couldn't put any weight on my knee without it buckling. So I hobbled
to the side and watched the rest of class.
It kinda feels like my knee is jammed. I can walk on it now, but can't balance
on it. Time to break out the ice and advil.
21 May
Worst. Flight. Ever.
My one day trip to DC is still on and now it's official, I have the worst
flight ever.
You might remember I asked to fly in/out on the same day, so I wouldn't have
to stay overnight. In fact, it reduced my trip by several days. The WOMAN
is staying an extra two days in DC, which would be my fate had I not requested
a shorter trip.
Although my request was granted, I didn't fail to notice the crap arrangements
that were made on my behalf. You see, although I am the manager of my department
and a team leader, with a company credit card, I can't make my own flight
arrangements.
The WOMAN has decided we NEED to fly out of New Orleans.
Need being the key word here. There is nothing wrong with the airport in town,
she just likes driving an hour to another airport. I, however, do not like
driving an additional hour when there is a perfectly good airport in town.
As of today, my flight leaves N.O. at 7:45am and returns 11:22pm. Let's do
some math here: I need to be at the airport at least an hour prior to take
off,it takes at least an hour to drive to N.O., and I need at least 30 minutes
to get ready in the morning.
So I need to get up at 5 fucking am. After my plane lands, I've got an hour
commute home, so I'm looking at getting home at 1am.
All for a 2 hour meeting that could be done over the phone.
ramblings by Whitey on 10:17 PM
108602101107445696
Whatcha talkin' bout?
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20 May
Traditional bruises
This evening we practiced our basic techniques with a partner. I really prefer
this type of training; you get to strike/block on a person rather than the
air. However, the air doesn't seem to leave as many bruises as a person does.
My partner this evening was a guy, which usually translates to a tougher class.
And by tougher I mean getting the hell beat out of you.
It looks like my abusive husband threw me down the stairs.
18 May
Lucky Dog
I miss Lucky.
17 May
Whitey Goes To Washington
It seems I'm going to Washington in two weeks, for a two hour meeting. Two
hours. Where's the logic? Why not have a teleconference instead? It's crazy
I know, but a 2 hour long distance call is cheaper than two plane tickets
with meals. And I mention two tickets because THE WOMAN is coming with.
I asked to fly in & out the same day. I don't see the point in staying overnight,
plus we'd save on hotel costs. I'm full of good ideas to save the state and
the government money. But THE WOMAN thinks I'm full of crap. She balked at
the idea.
Why do I even try?
Since I'm saving so much money with this travel plan, maybe I can get a new
box of business cards. HA! Silly idea. You see, a year ago THE WOMAN ordered
my business cards with the wrong title. When I pointed out the mistake, she
instructed me to use the entire box (250) and when I ran out, I'd get new
ones. Then she gave some lame excuse about the cost of the cards. Later that
day I found out the cards cost $16 a box.
My mistake is using logic with THE WOMAN. I need to channel my inner crazy.
Suggestions anyone?
16 May
Dogs don't speak Mexican
I brought Lucky to her new home today. Sigh.
I didn't want to, but between Fritter's depressing behavior, the cost of getting
Lucky shots, wormed & fixed, plus having to board two dogs with upcoming summer
trips...I found her a new home. Now I feel guilty.
This nice Mexican family wanted a black lab just like the old one that died
a month ago. Ethel, Lucky's new, new Mom said, "If you don't understand
something we say, it's because we're from Mexico". If I don't understand,
how will she?
I gave them the run down of Lucky and all her habits, while Ethel translated
for her family. I don't think they spoke any English. After telling them Lucky
would pee on command, the word PEE or BATHROOM
being the command, she repeated in another language for her family. They were
impressed. I wonder if they realized she only understands the English word
PEE?
I miss Lucky; Fritter could care less. She has resumed activities prior to
Lucky's arrival. I was mistaken in expecting a mourning period from Fritter.
From all indications, she's excited about Lucky's departure.
Ethel promised me regular updates on Lucky, maybe she'll let me know when
Lucky is bi-urinary.
ramblings by Whitey on 10:30 PM
108537019843927672
Whatcha talkin' bout?
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08 May
Crumpets anyone?
For logistical reasons, we celebrated Mother's Day one day early. The bossy
sister, ie my older sister, hosted the event at her house. When bossy sister
realized she didn't have enough beer for everyone, I offered to make a beer
run.
Seems like a nice thing to right? Wrong. I got fussed at for taking too long.
When I explain how I also needed to get gas, bossy sister berated me for not
shopping at the Chevron station three blocks away. I countered with how I
was saving money shopping at real store. Her quote,"that dollar you saved
on beer was not worth the time it took. We were all waiting on you."
I assume everyone was distraught about the lack of beer. Ha! No, there was
still beer to be had. Turns out, she was waiting on me so everyone could play,
get this, croquet.
Concern for beer I understand. Concern for croquet is moronic. As if. What
world does she live in where I would participate in that game.
While the others, save my brother-in-law, played what I'm sure was an exciting
game, I drank beer.
I'm willing to bet my beer was more thrilling than croquet.
07 May
Shunned No More
It seems I've lost the stigma of being single white female within the neighborhood.
For 2.5 years most of my neighbors ignored me. And when I say ignored me,
I mean they didn't speak or even nod at me. Other than dissecting my entire
life, I blamed it on being young and single in a subdivision filled with old
folks or families.
I'm convinced LBD
was the my key to acceptance. The owners of LBD were so grateful of my actions,
they put aside their single woman prejudice and started nodding at me when
pulling in/out of the driveway. After that, the landslide began...a wave here,
a "hello" there and then the gift of cat liter. LBD owners tossed orange cat
out and gave me their big box of liter.
With one families acceptance, the entire subdivision switched their view of
me. Or the bruises from karate give me that battered woman look.
Anyway, in the midst of doing yard work, my neighbor from across the street
came over to introduce himself - after 2.5 years. Then he points out the pine
straw on my roof and offers to clean it off. Not being a fool, I let him do
it.
Since I don't have a ladder and since I've been meaning to take care of the
roof for months now, I was excited to let someone else take care of it for
me.
After I thanked him, he informed me he used to do it all the time for little
old lady who sold me the house.
Perhaps being a single woman in the neighbor will start to have its advantages.
01 May
Have mop will travel
I can control the weather. Yes, I said it. How? you might ask yourself.
With a mop, I might respond.
There’s a definite connection between my mop and rain. When the mop comes
out, so does the rain. Example A: Last night I mopped the kitchen; this morning
the rain started. I hear your scoff via the Internet. Allow me to present
Example B: a week ago Thursday night, I mopped; it rained 30 minutes later.
The next day, I mopped again. Again? you say, why so soon, you
just mopped. Are you crazy? Depends who you talk to, I say.
It seems I mop, it rains, the dogs track mud in on the clean floor. This is
the circle of life. Example C: Friday I mop again because of the mud; it rains
two hours later. Examples A, B, and C are not the only freaky incidents, just
the most recent. Every single time the mop hits the kitchen floor, it rains,
usually within 5 hours.
I could personally be responsible to local droughts and/or floods. I'm willing
to prove my theory this summer. In the name of science, I will track, observe,
analyze and report, to you, my valued reader, my research.
Wouldn't it be cool if I was part Indian and mopping was my rain dance? Then
I could travel the world, on a mission of charity, mopping kitchens in water-starved
areas. Perhaps I'm a super hero and my power is bringing rain thru mopping.
If that's my super hero power I suck more than any other super hero.
Maybe it's a curse. Maybe I'm doomed never to have clean floors for mor than
5 hours. Maybe some one was slightly irratated with me a put some sort of
annoying curse on me.
Or maybe I am really crazy.
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